all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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