So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
