I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
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