Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
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