Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
