She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
