I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
