There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
