what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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