He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
