But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
