you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
