Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
