there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
