can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
