You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
