Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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