he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
