Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
