Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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