let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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