I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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