someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
You dont lie about slip and slides
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
