we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
how does that bad decision feel?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
