How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Boobs are out for the taking
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
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