okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
