Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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