Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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