Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
