I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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