it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
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