did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
