The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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