I'm eating all of the evidence.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Randomize
