Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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