we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
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