hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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