i don't like sucking hair
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize