You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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