Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize