I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Randomize