About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Watching her eat just hurts me
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize