for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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