i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
