you guys were way drunker than both of me
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Im just a social blackout drinker.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
he just fucked me for my cheese.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
