This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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