Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
