Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
