Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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