none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
