then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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